IT'S the toughest job,

Not going to school pobhia, Anxiety, Depressing, Hyper activity. All these are activities observed in kids today. They face a lot of challenges and competition from every individual outside and some kids loose moral in this constant battle.

A lot of kids now a days have a school phobia. This simply means, they don't want to go to school. The word school, gets a immediate reaction saying, My stomach hurts, my legs hurt or I am going to throw up.The reason for this is not because the kid is trying to be naughty. This is a kind of anxiety kids develop due to a lot of reasons.

We being adults hate to listen to our kids, and just move around ignoring each word said by them. We continue to force them to go to school. Some on the contrary just listen to the kid and make them sit at home for days.

Both the methods are not productive. There could be a million reasons why you are okay with your kid not going to school or going to school. However what is the important thing to note is the kid has anxiety over something. It is something the kid fears and feels dreadful about. It takes a lot of hard work to understand a kids problem, and as parents one is expected to do that hard work. Just a few tips in case a kid does not get involved or avoids a particular activity with excuses or repetitive answer or reasons

Check

• Need to check the jeanious ness of the excuse, if the kid says he has stomach ace, you need to check on the same. If he has fever if he has any physical symptom that agrees with what he is saying.

The Talk

• Not with every issue, however with recurring issues, it is very important to talk to the kid about what is bothering them. E.G if the kid is very playful, however refuses to play with kids of his age. Need to sit him down and ask what scares him, why he does not wish to play with others. You can ask the kid to create sketches of him playing and see what explanation he comes out with.
• Little kids tend to talk a lot, and endlessly at times, Acknowledging each and every sentence made by the kid, create dependency and blocks his individual self from growing, It is very important to acknowledge a serious question made by a kid. Or any opening where the kid is trying to learn and grow. However it is also important to acknowledge the constant catter with just a yes, no or a hmmm.

Steps

• It is important to start early, you cannot start working on a single day basis and expect the kid to improve. It has to be a constant growing cycle.
• At a early stage introduce the kid to an atmosphere of playing with kids outside, and don't allow them to become home bound.
• Do not allow kids to be lazy at playing age
• Do not allow kids to watch television all the time
• Do not allow kids to think negative comments and abusive language is acceptable
• Do not allow kids to disrespect others
• Talk to the kids about important of sharing, value of material things.
• Its important to get kids a regular sleep cycle, and a regular diet routine

Actions

To make the steps a reality, the below actions can help

• There should be a disciplined time table for every activity the kids do, starting their school going age.
• With age, the parent should spend greater duration explaining and observing each change and activity the kid does. its important that parent note what the kids are picking from kids around them, as to what they are learning, its important to observe their behavioral changes after they start school. Any negative influence should be eliminated right away.
• Introduce the kids to kids of their age, if they are shy. Spent time in parks and grounds with other kids.
• Do not buy kids everything they demand for, create a reward system for some items that are bigger demands. Its important to make them feel they have to deserve it before getting . Learn to Say no
• There has to be deadlines introduced, for watching TV, playing, sleeping.
• It is important to create a habit of eating away from the television, Kids that eat near the television end up either over eating or under eating. Resulting in health concerns
• Small punishments, that end up as disciplinary acts should be introduced, abusing kids is only a negative triad, as by abusing in front of the kid and then asking him not to do it , does not make sense to the kids mind. A kid should never be physically abuse as that makes him disrespect the parent and does not allow him to learn any better. Punishments like no TV, no ice cream, no chocolates or an extra hour of test. Making them stay locked in their room for an hour. These tell them the parent are the authority,

Every parent should read about any difficulty they have with their kids. There are a lot of people out there who can or cannot do better, We can either learn from their mistakes or learn from their experience. it is important to give kids importance. We cannot copy paste the formula used by our parents because times have changed. Today kids see and get influenced by a lot of things that were no existence in our time.

Happy parenting.

• Written by preeti vaswani.
• In category Social Life.
• 15 years ago.

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