Self esteem is one of the most important aspects needed for a successful life and thus it is important that your children develop a positive self esteem DSC07550
from their childhood so that they grow up into self made confident adults you would be proud of. It is the respect one gives to one’s self or how one feels about one self. The more good or positive you feel about yourself, the more self esteem you have and the more good it is for you in the long run.

A child with a positive self esteem would have the following traits-

  • The child acts independently and would most of the times not seek your or anyone’s help.
  • Takes responsibilities and tasks to complete own his/her own.
  • Takes up new tasks and challenges and enjoys completing them too.
  • Is an efficient speaker and a good team leader. Such children will always act as the flag bearer of the team. They have the capabilities to lead a group of people and contribute effectively to complete a team project.
  • Such children smartly handle emotions in their lives. They will take a joke as a joke among their friends and will be game most of the times.
  • A child with positive self esteem enjoys group activities.
  • Participates in competitions or events at school.
  • Such a child enjoys the company of people and seldom suffers from loneliness.
  • These types of children are generally friendly and are always keen to help others or participate in team games or activities.

Whereas a child with a low self esteem would have the following traits-

  • A child with low self esteem would always avoid doing new things or taking up new challenges.
  • On failures such a child is bound to make excuses or blame others.
  • May often fear taking up new tasks.
  • Such a child may not be able to handle emotions well and often break down or isolate him/her.
  • May feel unwanted or lonely at times. Such children do not like to be a part of a group as they do not trust themselves as to whether he/she would be a good team contributor.
  • Hesitates participating in events or comeptitionsat school. 
  • Is easily influenced by things or the surroundings.

How to help children develop a positive self esteem- A child can be best helped by the parents to help him/her build a positive self esteem. It is not difficult to boost up the self esteem in children as it is in adults. Here are some ways you can help your child build a positive self esteem. 

  • Whenever you feel your child has done some good work or activity appreciate his/her efforts. A child may not be able to understand your feelings so you need to tell him/her verbally that his efforts did not go in vain. Your words will motivate your child.
  • Teach and help the child in making decisions on his own. A child will develop confidence if he is allowed to take some of his decisions on his own. You can always help your child analyze the situations by alarming him about the negative and positive aspects of it. But you should try and leave the decision making step to him. Giving them the right to take their decisions will make them feel good about themselves.
  • If the child is unsatisfied with his results or an outcome of any project that he undertook, make it a point to sit down with him and analyze the results. Sit down and try to figure out why the outcome was not the way you expected it to be. What were the shortcomings and how can your child overcome those. Help them sort out the alternative solutions to a problem so that they are not completely dependent on a single option. You may be even required to fuel up your child’s energy levels by encouragement and motivation.
  • Sometimes criticism is important but do not include harsh words that can make your child feel embarrassed. If he fails in a test tell him that he can do much better as he has the abilities and the brains. Do not make him feel shameful or guilty. It is important that you communicate genuinely with your child and put across your words to him/her in a meaningful yet polite way.
  • Help your children to focus on their strengths and overcome their fears or weaknesses. This may require you to explain to them that they are worth doing a lot of things in life. Teach them that they should love themselves first.
  • Teach your child to be positive and optimistic with life. For instance if your child fears mathematics tell him that it is OK and he/she can very much win over the subject. Negative thoughts in children lead to anxiety and depression.
  • Children often make endless demands. While as a parent you might lovingly bring home everything your child wants or desires to have but make it a point not to fulfill unnecessary demands of your child. Teach your children that it is not necessary that they may get everything they desire to. If they ask for something or some things ask them to give them reasons for their demand. They must justify their demands before you. That will help them to keep their desires in control.
  • Parents should encourage their children to take up activities and sports or teach them to develop hobbies and interests which they enjoy. It gives your children pleasure and they feel good and refreshed.
  • Sometimes interference between your children’s fights becomes necessary but whenever possible let them sort out their fight by themselves.
  • Help your children develop an emotionally strong personality so that they do not get discouraged by small things in life. Help them build up a good tolerance level. This will help them in a long run.
  • Be friendly to your child so that whenever he or she faces any difficulty or setback he comes and shares it with you instead of feeling bad about it for a long period of time. And it is necessary for the parents to be fair to the child and not scold him or punish him.

Conclusion

Building a positive self esteem is very important for the overall personality development of the child. A child with a positive self esteem will face the ups and downs more efficiently as compared to a child with a low self esteem. Not only in the growth years a positive self esteem helps the child all through the phases of his or her life and is a lifelong ability that you can help your child build up for a happy and successful life ahead and always.


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