You cannot change overnight

How would you react if I say that respecting others’ opinion is one thing but taking that literarily is neither necessary nor that puts you in a situation which strengthens their own position by putting you down nor makes you feel inadequate and unsuitable for moving up the career ladder , so why worry about something which is not relevant! This is simply a situation which will weaken your position.  But that is not easy to convey indirectly through what one says, rather than stating it explicitly. However it all takes time since you cannot change your way of thinking overnight. So let them say what they like but you act and move on your own as like. 

Change your ways but according to your own capabilities. If you run after money, fame, a better job that is not wrong. Everyone is after these things but you must know your limitations and if you are limiting all your efforts around these activities or looking for things which some others with more capabilities than yourself then you’re probably in for disappointment. If you wish to remain happy avoid things beyond your control and you know that for sure. 

I know myself better than others

I might be sounding bit different and I accept that I am a bit different today and there is a reason for that. It is for the first time one of my articles has been rejected and the reason for rejection is the editor did not find use one particular world in the title appropriate. He said he had never heard that word ever before. He could be right because when I goggled that world most of the people who had used that particular world were corrected by people in comments because most of them were from western world and neither of them had heard that word before.

 So what I did I replaced the word with what I thought was the nearest possible word but send a link to the editor on his personal mail. He was astonished reading my mail and even apologized for his action but I did not mind it. I know we all have our limitations and work within them. That rejection shook my confidence for a moment but I knew I was right so did not give up only changed a bit to adjust others view although I could have gone into a prolonged controversy which would have brought no result for me.  Actually I am no more new to experiences like these but that was my first rejection so it shook some of my confidence for a moment but I did not let the experience override him because I did not want to give an ignorant much importance. 

Actually speaking this was my first rejection ever but certainly not the first experience where a personal opinion had disappointed me or pained me. I have gone through such incidents at number of times during my job also but more so during my online work where we have not met the people in person. I have learned to stay neutral on all such occasions but sometimes I have countered these people, mildly and with decency though. I respect them all but trust me I do not care a bit how they think about me, no more.  

The virtual world is different from real world

Let me accept, some of us have started to believe on falls things more than realities of life. We have started to believe virtual world more than the real world. I do not believe in how many friends do I have on Facebook and how many likes I get on my posts because I have not met more than 70% of my FB friends in my life. I do not feel happy because I am associated with hundreds of FB groups but I feel great when my real friends enjoy their evenings with me. 

My satisfaction level does not go up or down when I see the directory of my mobile phone increasing. In fact the virtual will never replace the real world as I have a firm faith that technique will never replace the happiness that you get in presence of real friends. I suggest you to come out of the virtual world and your home and meet the world in person. Let me also tell you that there is just one person in this world whose opinion matters to you more than anybody else’s and that is YOU. If you care for others more than you must then there is nothing that will ruin your career. So it’s important you respect yourself and do what you think is best in your own interest. 

Fear of rejection

When a person thinks too much about rejection or cares about others more than needed that is clear indication of our fear for others’ opinion. Do you really feel that they will get away from you if we would not agree to all their proposals or upset them in their unjust demands? As far I am concerned I have not much care for people with a particular point of view- how would they react! That’s none of my business. I know you may experience criticism and more circumstances but you cannot change all of them. And if you cannot change this or others criticizing you for things which you cannot change then why worry about them. 

You know what in certain cases I have decided to cut all such people out of my life. I don't need people stay around me who make indecent or discriminatory comments. I have decided to set certain boundaries with people who have no business to criticize me for no reason. It may take time but once you have decided to not care about unconcerned persons the matters end there. You reach to this decision once you know that people are not worried about your worries but they are concerned about their personal gains. 

You must learn from your own mistakes

There is a very common factor that most of us realize that rejection or not being part of a particular popular group, our body finds it tough to cope with certain situations or decreases its resistance to disease. I am in a way helping myself by staying away from all such activities. When we fail to achieve or make a mistake that becomes public we feel like the entire world is laughing on us. But, are you sure that it’s the reality? In my views it’s not because most people fail in their efforts to get success so you must know it as it’s a universal truth. No one in this world has 100% success record. You win some and at the same time you lose some, more or less. I am the one who get tougher with every failure. I learn from my mistakes. 

We must know our positive side

We all have positive points in us but do not know them but we mostly concentrate of negative points and keep worrying about them. I sometime feel to maintain a business like ledger having credit and debt sides and start posting my own positive and negative points and make a balance sheet in the end. I hope this should boost up my self confidence in the end.  I suggest you think about your higher self which means the sounds you hear reminding you that you’re right. You should keep consulting your own self and listen to him, I am again sure you will not regret that you heard and trusted your own inner voice.  

Sometimes they are right

Yes, it’s not wise to reject all the opinions out rightly but give them a thought before doing so.  Some of them may prove right or even precious too. But as I said you’re the best judge and you have to see whether they come good on your own way of thinking. I guess one is experienced enough to see the value of a particular opinion. You will have to decide about all such opinions on their merits.  It takes time in getting rid of certain habits and caring about others excessively is one of them. Once you learn to trust your own decision keeping others away out of your personal matters you will see your confidence level going up instantly. But do not forget sometimes they are right too.  

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